Bored kids are obnoxious kids

Our school schedule is a little different from most.  It's like a modified-modified version of year round.  The kids start school the last week of July and end the first week of June.  During the school year there are three major two week breaks.  We are currently in the middle of two week break #1 and I have realized something very important...bored kids are obnoxious kids.  (and they know all my hiding places)

I've tried giving them things to do, but everything I suggest they think is lame.  According to them no kid wants to spend their break cleaning or making sock monkeys.  I tried using Julio, my personal sock monkey, to persuade them otherwise but they just gave me that 'my mom is SUCH a dork' look.  (I told them to be nice, dorkiness is a genetic abnormality and it they get it from both sides)  If the last week is any indication, my children have decided that fighting is a TERRIFIC way to spend their break.  I haven't decided which is worse, bored and obnoxious or bored and snippy.

These children have been threatened repeatedly with beatings.  I think that's why they've stopped bathing regularly.  I tried forcing Lauren into the shower, but she's got me by 3 inches and 10 pounds.  (and, according to her, a whole lotta rage)  You turn the shower cold on your kids a couple of times and suddenly they don't want to bathe.  I just don't get it.